Year Three of the man-child administration was much like his first two, only more so. But before you compel yourself, for the sake of your sanity, to forget so much of what you saw and heard, perhaps you can be tempted to test your smarts on this year’s most memorable rhetorical sewage. Give it a try. Amaze your family and pets. And no Googling! And no fair peeking at the answers!

1. Trump frequently opined about wind turbine power (although, in his words, “I never understood wind”). He decreed that wind turbine power is responsible for several terrible things. Which ones?

a) It causes cancer

b) It spews tremendous tremendous amount of fumes

c) It forces us to flush toilets 10 times

d) It shatters our old-fashioned light bulbs

e) It gives us bird graveyards

2. True or false: Trump said that “there has never been, ever before, an administration that’s been so open and transparent.”

3. Trump falsely stated (for the fourth time) that a certain someone was “born in a very wonderful place in Germany.” To whom was he referring?

a) Hitler, who was actually born in Austria

b) Melania, who was actually born in Slovenia

c) His own father, who was actually born in New York

d) Hungarian dictator Viktor Orban, who was actually born in Hungary

4. Trump, referring to the Mueller report, said: “They did a report and there was no obstruction.” But according to the Mueller report, how many times did Trump commit obstruction of justice during the Russia probe?

a) Zero times. For once, Trump was accurate.

b) Three documented times

c) Six documented times

d) Ten documented times

5. True or false: Trump flunky Devin Nunes, the California congressman, sued a Twitter account called Devin Nunes’ Cow, because Devin Nunes’ cow had “bullied” him for moving his dairy farm from California to Nebraska.

6. “Crazy Nancy and Shifty Schiff” is

a) A new hipster rock band in Brooklyn

b) A new cartoon show pitched by Stephen Colbert

c) An improv remark from Trump at a recent rally

d) A new ice cream flavor from Ben and Jerry

e) A trending Twitter hashtag

7. Trump recently said: “You know what we used to do in the old days when we were smart? Right? The spies and treason, we used to handle it a little differently than we do now.” Who does he believe should be executed?

a) The NATO leaders who laughed at him behind his back

b) The patriotic civil servants who fed information to the Ukraine whistleblower

c) The patriotic diplomats who testified at the House impeachment hearings

d) The national security reporters who use anonymous sources

e) The Canadian broadcasters who cut his scene in “Home Alone 2”

8. Jeff Van Drew, the New Jersey congressman who was elected in ’18 as a Democrat, defected to the GOP and pledged his “undying support” to Trump. When voting on House bills in 2019, how often did he undyingly support Trump?

a) 83.7 percent of the time

b) 53.7 percent of the time

c) 11.7 percent of the time

9. A judge recently ordered Trump to pay $2 million in restitution. What had he done wrong this time? Which answer is true?

a) He’d stolen money that he fund-raised for military vets and spent it on himself

b) He’d shortchanged plaintiffs in the Trump University settlement

c) He’d screwed small contractors in Atlantic City, and finally had to pay up

d) He’d failed to pay Hachette Book Group after bulk-ordering 50,000 copies of Don Jr’s “Triggered”

10. Who did Trump call “a washed up psycho”?

a) Rosie O’Donnell

b) Meryl Streep

c) Spike Lee

d) Bette Midler

e) Barbra Streisand

f) Rob Reiner

11. Trump recently said: “Be quiet. Quiet. Quiet. Quiet.” Which woman was he telling to be quiet?

a) Fired ambassador Marie Yovanovitch, who was testifying on TV

b) Fiona Hill, who was exposing his national security weakness on TV

c) Nancy Pelosi, who was telling him that “all roads lead to Putin”

d) A White House reporter who was trying to ask him a question

e) The Danish prime minister, who said she wouldn’t sell him Greenland

12. Gordon Sondland, who blew the whistle on Trump during the impeachment hearings, got his ambassadorship after donating $1 million to Trump’s inaugural committee. Sondland testified that he and Trump were in “frequent contact” by phone during the Biden dirt-digging scandal. In response, what did Trump tell the press about Sondland?

a) “I have no idea who that never-Trumper is, very strongly.”

b) “I know more about wind power than I know about him.”

c) “I was in the olive oil business with his father, but that was a long time ago.”

d) “I know more about everything than anybody, except I don’t know that gentleman.”

e) “Let me just tell you, I hardly know the gentleman.”

13. Trump says that “a number of people” have committed “treason.” Who on this list has Vladimir Putin’s toady NOT accused of committing treason (as far as we know)?

a) Adam Schiff

b) “Sleepy Eyes” Chuck Todd

c) Pete Strzok and “his wonderful lover” Lisa Page

d) “Lying” James Comey

e) Nancy Pelosi

f) Andrew McCabe

g) Everyone working for the Mueller investigation

h) Mark Zaid, the whistleblower’s attorney

14) Trump recently said: “It was nice. It was everything.” To what was he referring?

a) His July phone call with the Ukraine president

b) His December diatribe letter to Pelosi

c) His sex with Stormy Daniels

d) His Trump University course roster

e) His White House’s email, last May, decreeing that when Trump visits Japan, the “USS John McCain needs to be out of sight”

f) His son Eric’s charity that shortchanged kids with cancer

15. Trump told “Fox and Friends” that Ukraine, not Russia, hacked the Democratic National Committee in 2016. Co-host Steve Doocy, in a rare journalistic moment, asked Trump to cite his source for that crackpot theory. Trump’s response:

a) “Who are you to question me?”

b) “Rudy, America’s mayor and a very great man, told me.”

c) “It’s what some people I hear are saying is.”

d) “Well, that’s what the word is.”

16. Trump recently said: “So – so here’s the thing, we have so many – regardless of what’s coming out, OK, the information that we have now is beyond belief already. But what they have coming out, I hear, is historic.” What was he incoherently pledging to reveal?

a) Transcripts of secret talks between Schiff and the whistle blower

b) Drug use stats in Nancy Pelosi’s district

c) Sales figures for Don Jr’s book

d) Corruption within Barack Obama’s FBI

e) His detectives’ long-awaited report on Obama’s foreign birth

f) His long-awaited gun reform plan (“something that’s going to be really good”)

17. During a speech to House Republicans, Trump said: “It’s gases inside, and read what they say – if it breaks bring it to your local whatever, have it wrapped, have it this – what are we doing? What are we doing?” Correctly identify what Trump was fuming about.

a) Energy-efficient light bulbs

b) Energy-efficient solar power

c) Energy-efficient wind power

d) Energy-efficient dishwashers

18. True or False: Trump called George Conway “a total loser” and “a total whack job” – the same guy he has previously praised as “a truly great voice” and “a top trial lawyer,” and even offered George a big job in the Justice Department criminal division.

19. Name the out-of-office Republican who crafted this gem, during a guest appearance on cable TV: “Why do I push back against this administration and the president? Because my nose is not a heat-seeking missile for the president’s backside.”

a) Former Arizona senator Jeff Flake

b) Former Pennsylvania congressman Charlie Dent

c) Former Tennessee senator Bob Corker

d) Former Illinois congressman (and GOP prez candidate) Joe Walsh

20. True or False: Trump will become the first impeached president to win re-election, losing the popular vote by five million but eking out an Electoral College squeaker, which he will call the greatest landslide victory since the era of ancient Rome.

ANSWERS: 1. (a,b,e) 2. True 3. (c) 4. (d) 5. True, except that Nunes moved his cows to Iowa 6. (c) 7. (b) 8. (c) 9. (a) 10. (d) 11. (d) 12. (e) option c was a quote from Godfather II 13. (b) 14. (a) 15. (d) 16. (d) 17. (a) 18. True, except that Trump offered Conway a job in Justice’s civil division 19. (b) 20. Who the heck knows? That one’s a freebie. Happy New Year!